Remember when Neo from the movie The Matrix was given the option to take a certain color pill
I have been thinking a lot lately about things that I know more about now then I did even just two years ago. Somedays I wake up and think man “if only I had taken the blue pill…”
I have taken the red pill on health lately. For example I know that when my back hurts I should get massage. That when my shoulder hurts I should get more massage and that my two outside fingers go numb when I have been on the computer too long. I know that many ailments can be solved with massage.
I know that some food when consumed in large quantities is extremely toxic for your gut. I know that a variety of foods do not make me feel very good. I now know that gluten is evil for a large number of people and that a diet heavy in vegetables and meats is good. (My mom probably told me that hundreds of times as a child, but that doesn’t mean I listened)
So now, knowing all of the things I know, whenever I make a food choice it is wrought with second guessing, or worse a sort of screw it all mentality. Today, I chose to eat pasta, I wanted the pasta and it was yummy. I know that the pasta is all carbs and will go straight to whatever part of my body it wants no matter how much I protest it going there. However, once you fall down the figurative rabbit hole for the day it seems to be hard to get back on course.
I know how to be healthy. I know how to lose weight. I know how to take care of what ails me. These are all things I know.
Today, I am tired of knowing, tired of telling myself that somedays you just don’t get your dreams. I have no regrets. Somedays though, I want to take the blue pill and wake up thinking I can be anything, do anything go anywhere. That my dreams can be reality. I want to feel confident telling my children that and not feel like I am feeding them the blue pill until they are old enough to realize that they can’t be anything they want to be. I mean seriously, I should warn them not to become a rodeo clown, I don’t think the pay is good and lets not even talk about health benefits.
Ignorance truly is bliss, because somedays I still really want a Big Mac. I still eat that food somedays even though my big judgy pants have decided that it is bad for them. The judge in my head is louder than any outside judgements could possibly strive to become.
That is why today I want to take the blue pill and wake up tomorrow with no memories of all of my learning about health journey. I want to wake up, eat a steak and remember what it feels like to live in a world without self-imposed limits.
Has Pfizer invented one of those pills yet? They should really get on that….just saying.